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Dear Katie & Kelly: Every year we rent a house with another family and they’re super tidy. We’re not messy per se but definitely not as tidy as them. We started out doing it as couples pre kids but have evolved as our families have grown. Now, as much as I love vacationing with them, I let me kids be a lot messier than theirs are so it’s a little stressful for me on vacation to keep things ship shape for a week. As in, it’s so stressful, I’m starting to think we might need to start a new vacation tradition.

Signed: Oxymoron in Omaha

Dear Oxymoron: Before you throw in the towel, have a conversation with your friends where you openly say you completely respect their desire for tidiness — it’s their vacation and messy might be their idea of too stressful — but wonder if perhaps while the kids are still little, they can compromise by lowering less important expectations a bit. Then set whatever lowest common denominator ground rules you can agree upon and call it a day. Alternatively, have the same conversation and offer to pay for a cleaning service once a day to tidy for you — your treat.

Bon Voyage! K & K

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